• Practice an attitude of gratitude and seek the beauty in life, count your blessings and engage in activities that provide guidance and positivity for the future

  • Learn from your losses and failures, they aren't ultimatums, they are lessons for your next step, take what you learned and expand your knowledge of the outside world while staying in tune with yourself, don't let things that didn't work out deter you from continuing on your journey

  • Your thoughts don't make you who you are, perception and perspective is key, if you think of a Toyota you're going to notice all the Toyotas driving around


My messages from the Seoul are quick affirmations, statements and suggestions to get you thinking and bring you out of your comfort zone sometimes. It is my hope that you’ll take what I’ve said and internalize it; carving out a space and move that aligns with who you are as an individual. I also realize that sometimes people want to dig deeper and develop a more concrete understanding of the ideas being presented. That’s why I like to follow up my messages with a brief breakdown of what I’m trying to convey to you, and ways I’ve utilized these concepts to grow personally and professionally.

Celebrate the wins and learn from the loses. It's easy to celebrate a job promotion, baby, engagement, or purchase of property, and although those can definitely be wins, those aren't the only wins that deserve to be celebrated. Completing a tough task at work or finishing a homework assignment are wins that should be acknowledged as well. Too often we overlook the many simple and basic (but relevant) wins we take on every day that get us closer to our goals and ultimately make us happy.

Sometimes we get so caught up in the things we didn't do or the things we didn't get or don't have, that we don't truly appreciate the things that we have done and what we do have. Maybe you didn't get the promotion you were waiting for, but you did still ball out at work that day and you have the opportunity to grow somewhere else. Practicing an attitude of gratitude is key to being happy and growing so keep that same energy for all wins, big and small.

Learn from your perceived losses. I say perceived because as I stated before, sometimes losses aren't actually losses, they're just different outcomes than what you wanted. Losing a loved one or being laid off are events that are beyond your control and can leave you at a loss. However, every loss, perceived or not, are opportunities to learn and grow from. Professionally, being fired is a tough loss and affects your self-confidence and your pockets. You may feel like you were unjustly fired, but you should still take a moment to remove or work through your emotions and evaluate your performance and your goals.

Maybe you were just working there to pay the bills and you weren't always motivated to do your job, or now this is an opportunity for you to pursue a career that aligns with your goals and provides work-life balance. In a personal scenario, you may have gotten into an argument with a good friend and they decide they don't want to be friends with you anymore. This is a good time to look at yourself as unbiased as you can and own your behavior and decision. It could also mean that you two outgrew each other and are moving in different directions. Emotions can make 'breakups' sticky, but ultimately you're both good people (typically) and deserve to prosper. That loss can show you that and teach you how to move on in a healthy way.

How you perceive your wins and losses is vital because it will sway and affect your mood and decisions moving forward. If you wake up late, spill coffee on yourself, make a mistake at work and get a new client from your side hustle you can look at that day as a bad or rough day or as a good day. It's all about perception. I would personally look at that as a good day and celebrate the win of gaining a client because the other stuff is bound to happen in the daily grind, but the client is getting me closer to my dreams and will attract more positivity and wins.

Think about this, have you ever thought about a car and then started seeing that car everywhere you went? Those cars didn't just appear, everyone didn't run out one day and buy them so you could see them. They have always been there, you're just mindful of them now. That's how thoughts and energy works; when you think about the wins and learn from the losses you will begin to see more wins because you are more mindful of them.


  • Practice an attitude of gratitude, count your blessings daily and project your goals outward

  • Learn from losses and failures, grow and keep going

  • The world isn't happening to you, you are happening to your world, what do you want your impact to be?

  • You are not your thoughts, work on positive self-talk and mindfulness

  • Perspective is key, a ton of things (cars) will happen daily, which (cars) will you point out?

Kia ‘Seoul’ Riley works for Revolt TV and founded and runs the XXXV Collective that specializes in helping Creatives, Entrepreneurs and Artists (CEAs) pursue their passions. Her From the Seoul brand specializes in life coaching, business consulting and motivational speaking. Her new ebook The Neaux Renaissance is out now!!!

IG: @seoulstarr